wow, that is freaky… everything you described is what I was going through (exactly!) about 6 months ago. I got married in april, and I (like you) wanted to start right away, but my husband wanted to wait a year, and that really upset me. I felt so frustrated and sad, cuz ttc was all […]
Written on Sunday, July 13th, 2008 by ferminhampton :: 0 comments to this post
wow, that is freaky… everything you described is what I was going through (exactly!) about 6 months ago. I got married in april, and I (like you) wanted to start right away, but my husband wanted to wait a year, and that really upset me. I felt so frustrated and sad, cuz ttc was all I wanted and all I thought about, but he wouldn’t budge. and like you guys, we both have good jobs, we’re 23 and 24 (so a normal age to have a baby), but he was worried about not having time for “us” and he didn’t think we were ready (for no good reason). So, trust me I know how you feel - pissed off, like you’re mad at him but you don’t want to be mad you want to be comforting and try to change his mind, but the sucky truth is that if he’s not quite ready, you don’t want to push. In our case, we compromised, which was really really hard for me, we agreed to wait 6 months (that way I had to wait 6 months, and he would agree to 6 months earlier than he would have originally planned). It gave him time to get used to the idea of being a dad and parenting and I think it helped him realize that life won’t be worse off with a kid, now he’s really excited and we’ve just started trying and he’s better off having had 6 months, that he felt he needed. I know it won’t be easy for you having to wait - I felt so impatient and mad sometimes, but if he needs the time - give it to him!! otherwise, he may resent having a baby or feel rushed and pressured and it could cause arguments. Good-luck, try to be patient with your hubby, i bet he’s a great guy who’s just a little scared and could just use a little longer to get used to the idea!! as long as you’ve made yourself clear that it is important to you and that he needs to be willing to compromise, otherwise your feelings are just neglected, then you guys can talk about come up with a good time that works for you both!!
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